stressed.

the things ive done, always make the ppl ard suffer or unhappy. )=

did not went to send sy off - shes disappointed

rejected the job offer at the v last min when things are almost finalised - agent & co super unhappy, thinks that im irresponsible

posted up a pic which i shudnt have taken in the 1st place - eds angry & upset that he dun wanna talk to me

WHY am i always doing things that end up hurting ppl? WHY am i, already 21, still so irresponsible and living each day as it is, with no goals and nothing? WHY am i always comparing myself with other ppl and end up making myself unhappy & inferior? WHY am i always regretting what ive done or not done?

i feel so angry with myself for being like this. i hate myself. wheres all my dreams gone to? why do i wake up one day, full of suicidal thoughts in my mind, with no meaning in life anymore?

why cant i be like am or sy who are pursuing their dreams overseas? or why cant i be like yx? why cant i be like serene? or yilin, or jess or whoever is successful? why am i thinking of all these? what the hell is wrong with me? sobs sobs.