Im still in my office. So quiet I can hear the crickets outside. Right now, its only the sound of me tapping on my keyboard and the mp3 playing. Yes, Ive finished my work, just waiting for Jing to end work to go home together. I think both of us had a tough day at work today. It was another same rotten week like last week. C'mon, when will our work and life start to get better? :(

As I was typing out this entry, alot of things flashed to my mind. Should I just let it go? Or 追究到底 again, not sure if the answer will be a truthful one also. FML seriously!

Anyway in case you didnt received my email to you..

I have changed my email address to:

azaleas.loh@gmail.com

Loves.

What if..

I did something wrong and found out something bad again? Are you the one that I can trust? Or I should believe what I saw?

Second time.. Im losing hope. Shall I initiate? Godamn.

Yah, you know I was talking about Bf Low ranting on about the money & marriage stuffs..

We were at the topic again just now.

I guess Im just not prepared for marriage now. Can you imagine the load differences I have to bear after marriage?

1) I have to move into a new house and stay with new people

2) I have to start doing house chores!!

3) I have to start wearing bra in the house

4) My lifestyle will have a dramatic change (I can foresee)

5) I have to support 2 families

Its not that I dun love him, I dunno how to explain my feelings right now.

He's having 2nd thoughts to whether Im the correct one also :(

Me: *for the dunno how many times* I feel like going holiday leh. You wanna go with me anot?

Him: *Irritated tone* No money la!

Me: Then I go myself can anot?

Him: I know you always say say only, but you know I always hear you talk about all these I very sian leh. DO YOU WANNA SAVE UP FOR MARRIAGE ANOT?

Me: *quiet tone* not really leh.

Him: Not that I dun love you, but Im starting to think if you're really my lifetime partner anot...

WHAT CAN I SAY?! So many problems going through my mind can! We already have so many differences about the wedding itself, whats more after marriage? HAI.

Omg, literally more than a month or so since my last update. Im wondering if there's anyone still reading this blog..

There's so much ways of complaining online nowadays that blogging seems to drift away from me. Shall I announce that Ive set up my twitter & 微博 account like finally? Yah lo, to keep myself updated of my friends. Yah, I cant live without my friends. *GRINS*

Did some 大扫除 on my blog too. Realised some friends dont update anymore, so decided to remove their pretty faces from here. They take up too much space.

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Its coming to a year end. Another year flies again. *looks up at the sky* Where am I getting myself into again? Same old questions running through the mind.. [boring..]

Bf Low says I should go for airstewardess instead of my current, since I always pester him to bring me on a holiday. Well, not that I cannot go myself (I dun mind), he forbids me thou. Im under his terrible monetary control.

1) To save up for marriage
2) To save up for rainy days
3) To save for a better life after marriage
and the list goes on..

He rants like an old ahpek, but i still adore him! :)

Sometimes I wonder ah, I save up so much hor, never get what I want also sian.
I save up - I cannot go holiday, I cannot do alot of shoppings, I cannot get a new flat, I cannot buy a car, I cannot *alot of things ah, I cannot rem* hahaha.
Life's sucha bore, don't you agree?

My job now pays more, but I feel more broke than before. I got to feed myself every lunch time and the stupid gantry at the train stations keep asking me to top up my ez-link, even thou I've just top up like last week. So in the end, I think I spend more than before lo! WHICH IS REAL BAD. *shake my head vigorously*
Did I also mention that my previous mobile subscriber send me a lawyer letter just because I have not finished paying up my outstandings? Thou Ive already terminated my line with them, Ive still been obediently paying them $50 every month. I dunno how my last bill with them comes up to $300plus. :( Anyway, the main thing is they asked me to pay for the legal costs as well. NABEH CB. WHY SHOULD I WHEN YOU ARE THE ONE WHO WANTS TO SEND ME THIS SHIT? Hai, anyway problem settled la. DaMn 1.

Okay, Im going home! See you guys soon! Loves.