Has it got anything to do with becoming full-time in this hotel?

no. ive always been like this ever since i dunno when.

when i realised i couldnt get happy anymore,

when i couldnt get satisfied no matter what,

when my demands become so high that sometimes it has become ridiculous & unreasonable.

i also dunno what's wrong with me. ( i dun mean sex okay)

i just keep thinking,

so much that i think im going to keesiao already.

i think abt this, i think abt that,

i think abt everything that i can think of!

then he say the problem is i think too much,

but also not i want one lo!

i also v xinku okay!

on sat nights, i would think abt working for the whole day on sun,

then i become depressed and upset. and then i'll start to think bad again.

on days when i couldnt felt any love,

i think wild again.

is he out enjoying with other ppl so much that he has forgotten abt me?

am i still being treated as his gf?

i admit my demands become more & more as time goes by,

but i cant help it lo.

i just keep thinking that the love he has for me has decreased.

maybe not as much as before lah, i also dunno.

or maybe is we become too 'xi guan' with each other already.

IS IT?

last time we used to talk & laugh & smile.

he used to teach me cantonese over the phone.

'we used' alot of things.

then now like everything died down.

everyone's busy with their own.

maybe thats why i feel so neglected lah.

hehe. anyway, lucky that he did not choose to go over to raffles hotel.

if not, lagi worse.

he will only sleep & work, sleep & work.

hehehe.

life is so boring.

omg lah.

i saw one watch, nice okay.

whee whee.

i like and im going to buy.

i dun care.

it costs $239.

but everyone should invest in a good watch lah, instead of what invests in a good mascara? (jing will know (= )

and from now on, i will save to buy myself lots of watches, many many designs & many many patterns. hehehe. so exciting!

nabei lah.

one stupid guest comes in now and say he wants a massage.

hello? we closes at 8pm okay?

and our massage is usually 60mins.

now therapist is still engaged lah.

nabei!

another death to blog abt.

my atm lecturer, mr kenneth tham.

died on Aug 13.

collapsed in school, and pass away before the ambulance could reach.

wads wrong with all the lives nowadays!

oh my.

all these deaths - doesnt really teach me how to treasure life more.

instead, i only see the dark side, which made me even more have no meaning in life.

sobs.

bye

i dunno why but i keep having nightmares when i sleep.

my nightmares is not those got ghost or vampires running after u that type lo.

its the type that which i fear most in my life.

like losing someone precious or someone special ignoring me, and finding me a bother.

and its very scary okay!

disturb me sleeping, walao!

then i found out, everytime when im not working the next day,

i dun really get those dreams, or maybe ive already forgotten them when i wake up.

its the 'going-to-work-again' that is making me miserable.

can i get the hotel to compensate me? hee

i just got the news today that i'll be transfered to the spa for one month to help out.

walao, what the fuck lo.

even though i can get to learn new things lah,

but it makes me feel like im like a unwanted ball,

being kicked around here and there.

and i really hate to be a receptionist at the spa okay!

i hate the spa! nabei.

do i have a choice?

the other day i was out shopping with yan.

when we were having dinner,

walao! theres still really cute boy sitting alone at Pepper Lunch.

doesnt look local, but cant really say where he is from.

he started to talk and shout to everyone near him.

and then when we were finishing our dinner,

i started to make ugly faces at him.

hahaha, and he make ugly faces at me lo!

when we got tired of each other,

he started to imitate peiyan.

whatever she did, he did.

like twirling the hair, some girly stuffs.

walao eh, hes damn cute lo!

let me show you this cute lil boy, (i call him the pepper lunch boy)

whose father is a music player in the underground, i think!

cute right!

nex time my kid must also be this cute.

my guideline for grooming my kid!

hehhehheh.

you know that national day,

i realised sth.

its so lonely to have the good things all to yourself.

i was watching the fireworks in #926 alone.

irene even though was in the hotel, but not able to join me.

then i stood at the window, watching the fireworks by myself.

SO LONELY!

lucky naren n madave came in,

and then i felt abit better.

hehhehs.

so, dear all!

please dun be selfish and keep all the good things to yourself!

SHARE!

Deepest condolences to

Shaik, our concierge member.

he passed away on 10th Aug.

walan eh, the news came as a shock to me ok?

e briefing was halfway thru, and i came in, holding on to mary's bday cake,

and the rest told me abt the news.

so sad lah.

he's not a bad guy okay.

he was the one who gave me my xmas present last yr when we were having gift exchange in the hotel, and often we met at the bus-stop, and he would ask me to take the same bus home with him (since we both took 147).

now also cannot already.

sigh, it was so sudden lah.

he fell in the toilet while bathing,

knocked his head against sth and went into a coma.

and then pass away.

life is so unpredictable lo.

okok, you rest in peace okay.

i hope to see u soon. (when i died)

hello, happy birthday Singapore!

you're so old.

im at work now lo, on national day.

sibei sian.

but at least i got to catch the fireworks

in #926 all by myself.

and then naren n madave came n join me.

whee whee.

okok, now i gtg to close my cashier.

i got alot to update ah!

pls keep coming back to read.

hehehe.

blah blah blah...

today is my 1st day at club.

and im in 6-2 shift. *faints*

everything looks the same still.

the first in, first out is still there.

maybe only the seats lah.

it has changed colour.

aiya, i miss them leh.

ah chow, ah teo, ah toh and ah lee.

when i was arranging the cheese board,

i thought of toh.

her hands always smell after she cut the cheese.

when i was arranging the liquors and wine,

i thought of lee.

the only one day when only got the 2 of us working.

okay, for chow & teo,

nth much reminds me of them!

its actually the club that reminds me of them lah!

boohoos.

those times....